Through a captivating narrative, Adrian Rogers explores the deep-set beliefs surrounding parental honor and respect. He addresses the generational wisdom parents impart, the significance of family ties, and how these relationships mirror our connection with God. Rogers calls on listeners to cherish their parents, urging us to express our love and gratitude while there is still time. This message serves as a reminder to nurture our familial bonds and carry forth the teachings and guidance of our elders.
Known for his unique ability to simplify profound truth so that it can be applied to everyday life, Adrian Rogers was one of the most effective preachers, respected Bible teachers, and Christian leaders of our time. Thanks for joining us for this message. Here’s Adrian Rogers.
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Exodus 20, verse 12 says, Honor thy father and thy mother, that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God hath Giveth thee. I want to speak today on this subject, how to be the child of a happy mother. There was an evangelist who was the Billy Graham of his day. His name was Dwight L. Moody. Dwight L. Moody, after a lifetime of observation, after a lifetime of service to the Lord Jesus Christ, after a lifetime of study of the Word of God, made an astounding statement. And I want every child to listen to that statement. And of course, every one of us is some mother’s child. Here’s what Dwight L. Moody said, I have lived over 60 years and I have learned one thing if I’ve learned nothing else. No man or woman who dishonors father or mother ever prospers. Think about it. Listen to it again. Now, this is not just somebody saying this. This is one of the greatest Christian leaders who’s ever lived. And he says this, not thoughtlessly, but he’s saying, it is something that I’ve learned. It has been the sum total. It has been the observation of a lifetime. And he said, I know this if I know nothing else. So listen to it. I have lived over 60 years, and I have learned one thing if I’ve learned nothing else. No man or woman who dishonors father or mother ever prospers. Now, this command that I just gave you comes from the Ten Commandments, which says we’re to honor our father and our mother. And you know if you’re a Bible student that the Ten Commandments are divided into two categories or two sections. The first part of those commandments deal with our relationship with God, and we call those the vertical commands. And then the next commands deal with our relationship to man. We call those the horizontal relationships. First we have to be right with God, and then we can be right with man. And if we’re not right with man, we’re not right with God. But we can’t be right with God until we’re right with man. And so all of the commands are summed up in love God with all of your heart and love your neighbor as yourself. Now you knew that already. But now the question comes, as God starts the second section in these commands, and He begins with this statement, THAT WE ARE TO HONOR OUR FATHER AND OUR MOTHER. NOW WHY DOES GOD START THE SECOND SECTION OF THESE COMMANDS WITH THIS PARTICULAR COMMAND? Well, it is a pivotal command. You see, our parents are the first people we meet. Now, if we cannot learn to love and respect our parents, then it’s obvious we cannot learn to love and respect anyone else. What God is saying is that the religion that doesn’t begin at home, it just simply does not begin. Because what happens at home is the basis of everything else. If the home decays, then you know the church decays. If the church decays, then society decays and the state decays. And so we began here, God tells us that the basis of all of our relationship to everybody else and everything else on planet earth after we get right with God is in a home where we learn to honor God. our Father and our Mother. So it’s not something merely sentimental that we do when we have Mother’s Day. Folks, it’s biblical. As a matter of fact, it is commanded that we honor Father and Mother. And the Mother’s Day is just a token of that honor we’re to be giving 365 days a year to both our Father and our Mother. Now, the word honor literally means to add weight to. Now, no mother wants weight added to her. So let’s explain it a little bit. It means to think of them with seriousness. It means to take our parents seriously, to reverence them, to respect them. Now, I’ve thought of four ways today that we can be the child of a happy mother. And may I say that if you’re the child of a happy mother, you’re going to be the happy child of a happy mother. Number one, I can honor my mother by the life of my mother. that I live. My life will either honor or dishonor my parents. Now, I’m to live, therefore, a life of obedience, first of all, to my parents. Now, this is true when we’re children. We are to obey our parents. And even when we’re old, we’re to learn to take their advice. But when we’re children, we are to obey our parents. Colossians chapter 3, verse 20 says, Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Do you want to please God? You cannot please God by displeasing your parents. And not only is there a blessing in obedience, but there’s great danger in disobedience. I was astounded. I was amazed as I studied the Bible about this matter of obeying parents. And I was amazed at how God looks upon the sin of disobedience to parents. God gives a catalog of sins, the most terrible, horrible, hurtful, heinous, hellish sins that you can think of. And right in the list of that catalog of sins, He mentions the disobedience to parents. For example, Romans chapter 1 and verse 28. And even as they did not like disobedience, to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind to do those things which are not convenient, being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness, full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity, whisperers, Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents. You think about that. Did you hear the list of things that I just read? And then God put in that list disobedient to parents. And He’s not finished. He describes these as being without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful, who knowing the judgment of God that they which commit such things are worthy of death. God says in the Old Testament that if you’re disobedient to your parents, we’re going to see in a moment that a child who was willfully arrogantly, rebellious, would be put to death. That’s how God felt about this sin and still feels about this sin, though today He does not exact the death penalty because we’re living under a different economy. But what I’m saying is that obedience brings a tremendous blessing. It is well pleasing to the Lord. Disobedience to parents is a terrible, horrible sin. I want to read again some Scripture to show you that when God wants to describe perilous times, When God wants to describe an age, a society that is unraveling, that is coming apart, God says that disobedience to parents is one of the marks of the last days of a generation. 2 Timothy 3, beginning in verse 1, This know also that in the last days… perilous times shall come. Now, God is going to give us a sign of the last days and the peril of those last days. Listen to it. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents. unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, truce breakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures, more than lovers of God, having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof, from such turn away. Now in that horrible catalog of sins of the last days, again God mentions disobedience to parents. I want to tell you, dear friend, that disobedience to your parents is going to invite the judgment of God upon your life. Let me give you another scripture, Ephesians chapter 6. Verses 1 through 3, “‘Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor thy father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.'” Now, God said, honor father and mother that you’ll live a long life. Hey, folks, you want to shorten your life? Dishonor your parents. Perhaps you ought to put a sign over the door of your child’s bedroom that says something like this, warning. Disobedience to your parents may be harmful to your health. That’s what God is saying. Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment with promise. Oh, you say, well, Brother Rogers, what if my parents are not right? What if my parents tell me to do something wrong? Well, this scripture says, children, obey your parents in the Lord. Obviously, obviously, if your pastor tells you to do something that’s contrary to the Word of God, you ought not to do it. If the President of the United States tells you to do something that’s contrary to the Word of God, you ought not to do it. If your husband tells you to do something that is in direct violation of the Word of God, you ought not to do it. are commanded by the parents to kill or to steal or to prostitute themselves. Of course, they’re not expected to do that. There’s always the fact that we must obey God rather than man. And so you have to interpret Scripture by Scripture. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. But I want to say that little children are not old enough or wise enough to make choices as to what is right and wrong primarily. They have to depend upon their parents. When I was a little child, I couldn’t understand why my parents did certain things. I couldn’t understand, for example, my mama would take a nap when she didn’t even have to. Or I couldn’t understand why my dad didn’t buy all the candy he wanted, he had the money. Or why my parents would sometimes just sit in the house and talk when they could go out and play. We don’t understand things from a parent’s perspective. And so God gives little children parents and then the Bible says that we are to obey our parents. Now that’s one way, dear friend. That’s part of the life that I live that is going to honor my parents by obedience and then just by living an honorable life. You know the Bible says that a child can bring his mother to shame. Why is that? because we are an extension of our mother. We are an extension of our parents. Their life is in us, and we are an extension of them. And if I live an honorable life, then that honors my parents. And so one way that I can honor my parents, one way that you can honor your parents is by the life that you live, a life of honor, a life of obedience to those parents. Now, secondly, Another way to honor your parents, not only the life that you live, but the load that you lift. The load that you lift. You’re to help your parents. Children are to be taught honesty and industry and integrity in the home. And you sin against your parents if you don’t help them in the home. And you sin against your children if you do not teach them to work. Some of you kids today, your mother has to nag you to do the dishes or beg you to clean up your room or scold you about these things. I know some teenagers whose bedroom would win the city dump look-alike contest. About the only time you’ll ever clean it up is when Sears gets a riding vacuum cleaner. And you… I dishonest your parents. They’re to be taught industry in the home. And so when you are young, you’re to help them, your parents. And when they are old, you are to care for them. Now there’s a serious problem in our age, and that is the care of the old and the elderly. The more pagan a society gets, the less that society cares for the aged and the infirm. And in some pagan societies, when people get old and age, they’re just turned out of the society, turned out of the village to wander in the jungles until they die. You know, there’s something very interesting. The Bible teaches that we cannot use our religion and our church-going and our church-giving as an excuse for not taking care of our parents. The Bible says this in Matthew chapter 15, beginning in verse 3, Jesus is talking to the Pharisees, and He answered and said unto them, Why do you all so transgress the commandment of God by your tradition? For God commanded, saying, Honor thy father and thy mother, and he that curseth father and mother, let him die the death. But ye say, Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, It is a gift by whatsoever thou mightest be profited of me.” That is, I took what I was going to give you and I gave it to charity. What I was going to give to you, I just felt led to give to somebody else. I did something nice and religious with it. Now, Jesus said, But ye say, Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, It is a gift by whatsoever thou mightest be profited of me, and honor not his father or his mother, he shall be free. Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.” Ye hypocrites, well did Isaiah prophesy of you, saying, This people draw nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoreth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me. In vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men. God says that any man, any woman, any boy, any girl in this church today worshiping God, who doesn’t take care of his parents, is a hypocrite. That is what God says. You say, well, I don’t have time for my parents, but boy, I’m sure a big church worker. That doesn’t impress God. Not at all. You say, well, my parents are a bother. I have to carry them around. I have to change their clothes. It stinks. I have to feed them. They slobber. Hey, folks, they changed you. They bathed you. You slobbered on them. You spit up on them. Did you know that the Bible teaches that if we don’t take care of our parents… that we are worse than infidels? We don’t even make it up to an infidel? Let me give you a passage of Scripture here. Over here in 1 Timothy chapter 5 and verse 4, If any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to show piety at home, and to requite their parents. That means to take care of their parents, for that is good and acceptable before God. 1 Timothy 5, 8 goes on to say, But if any provide not for his own, and especially those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel. He doesn’t even make it up to infidel status. if he doesn’t take care of his own. Now, so many people use this passage here in 1 Timothy 5, 8 to say that parents ought to take care of children. If any man provide not for his own, especially those of his own house. But that isn’t what he’s talking about. He’s talking about children providing for their parents. You read it in context. And the Bible says that if a child does not take care of his parents, he is worse than an infidel. Now, how can I honor my moms? How can I honor my dad? Number one, by the life that I live. Number two, by the load that I lift. Number three, by the lessons that I learn. Proverbs chapter 1, verses 8 to 9. My son… Hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother. For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thee, and chains about thy neck. Now, he’s not talking about chains of bondage. He’s talking about chains of ornament, like a gold chain, like an ornament. When you listen to the advice of your parents, when you learn from your parents, the older generation, we get the smarter our parents get. Isn’t that true? You know, when we’re 16, we think they’re really out of it. And at 19, we feel that we’ve surpassed them so far they’ll never catch up to us. At 22, they’re just out of sight somewhere back there. I mean, we know everything. But at 30, you know they start to get smart again? And at 40, we think they’re just about perfect. And the older you get, the smarter your parents. This is one of my favorite Mother’s Day things and I want to share it with you. The title of this little article is called, The Meanest Mother. Surely mine was the meanest mother in the world. While other kids ate candy for breakfast, I had to have cereal, eggs, and toast. While others were enjoying pop and candy for lunch, I had to eat a sandwich and fruit. I was not alone in my suffering. My sister and two brothers had the same cruel mother I had. She insisted on knowing where we were all the time. She had to know who our friends were and what we were doing. And if we said we’d be home in an hour, that meant an hour or less, not more. When we were young and disobeyed, this tyrannical mother of ours would strike us with a switch. Imagine! And now you begin to see how really mean she was. But even this physical brutality was not the worst. We had to be in bed early, get up early. We never got to sleep till noon like our friends. While they slept, we worked. I mean, my mother broke every child labor law there is. We were not yet 16 when we had to wash dishes, make beds, help cook, and all sorts of cruel things. Surely that meanest mother must have lain awake nights thinking up mean things for us to have to do. She demanded that we tell the truth even if it hurt, and sometimes it hurt like everything. By the time we were teenagers, life became increasingly unbearable. Our dates were not allowed to toot the horn and bring us running as other girls’ dates did. My cruel mother embarrassed us by insisting that our dates come to the door and get us. And where some of our friends got to date when they were 12, my cruel mother refused to let us date until we were 15 and then only for school functions. My sister and brothers and I finally got away from my cruel mother and could do as we pleased. But by now we were helplessly warped and twisted in our behavior. We grew up taking baths and tithing to the church, and we never learned not to. None of us ever had the opportunities other young people have to wreck schoolhouses or burn flags or smoke pot. Each of us went to school and learned, went to work and earned. Each of us got married once and still is. It’s a rut. We’re going in the same direction in which we’ve been pushed. And my meanest mother in the world pushed us into this bathing and learning and earning and giving and living and loving. Mine was the meanest mother in the world. We need more mean mothers. Amen. Mothers who mean business for God. Now, how can we honor our parents? Listen, folks, by the life that I live, by the load that I lift, by the lessons that I learn. You say, well, my parents are not as smart as I am. Hey, folks, that doesn’t have anything to do with it. Suppose we’re going on a trip and we’re driving. Your parents, or let’s suppose my parents have gone on ahead of me and I’m going out to California and I’m in Fort Worth and they’re in Phoenix. And they get on the phone and we talk together. And they tell me, they say, now, Adrian, you want to be sure not to take Highway 72 because they’re doing work on it. It took us about three hours there. There’s another bypass. And they say, Adrian, listen, we stopped at the best motel. It was phenomenal. Great restaurant and so forth. And they tell us about it. And they say, and be sure to see thus and such a thing. It’s magnificent. That doesn’t mean they’re smarter than I am or I’m smarter than they are. It just means they’ve been a little further down the road. Isn’t that right? a little further down the road, and they love me. They’ve seen things, their detours and beauties and all sorts of things they want me to know about. And I can honor them. I can honor them by the lessons that I learned. The Bible says to learn from your parents is like an ornament of grace around your neck. NOW LET ME MENTION THE LAST WAY THAT I CAN HONOR MY PARENTS AND BE THE CHILD OF A HAPPY MOTHER, BY THE LIFE THAT I LIVE, BY THE LOAD THAT I LIVE, BY THE LESSONS THAT I LEARN AND BY THE LOVE THAT I LAVISH. WHEN I LAVISH MY LOVE UPON THEM, AND I’VE CHOSEN THE WORD LAVISH BECAUSE I’M TALKING ABOUT THAT KIND OF LOVE, We are to love them with a great love, with a lavish love, because I want to tell you that their life’s blood flows in us. Their very life is in us, and they would give their lives for us. I believe that the closest thing on this earth to the love of God is the love of parents for the children. I believe it’s the closest, greatest illustration of the love of God. And so we are to return that love. Oh, folks, listen. If your parents are still living, let me encourage you, write that letter now. Do it now. Pay that visit now. Send that gift now. Do that chore now. Give that kiss of affection now. Whatever you’re going to do, do it and do it now. Write a thank you note to your parents. Shakespeare said, how sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless child. Oh, friend, you are to respect your parents with such respect. Oh, you say, well, my parents are not perfect. Of course not. Do you know anybody who’s perfect? Only perfect children can demand perfect parents. It’s been an amazing to me thing where God put middle age and teenagers together. Kids are not the only one going through stages, you know. Parents go through stages. Listen to these verses. Leviticus 19, verse 3, And ye shall fear every man his mother and his father. The word fear means reverence. Leviticus 20, verse 9, For every one that curseth his father or mother shall surely be put to death. He hath cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him. Friend, if some of you teenagers were to shoot off your mouth at your parents back in the Old Testament times, you wouldn’t see the sun come up the next day. That’s the way God feels about it. Listen, Proverbs chapter 30, verse 17, The eye that mocketh at his father or despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it. Every now and then, when my kids do something wrong, I’ll let them get away with it. But I’ll tell you one thing, they won’t get away with it in our house, and you can ask any of them. They will not get away with sassing their mama. I mean, they won’t get away with it. There’s something in me that’ll rise up. I know what that lady has gone through for those children. And any child who does not lavish love upon his mother and show that respect does indeed fulfill what Shakespeare said, sharper than a serpent’s tooth. Show that love. Do it and do it now. Dead noses smell no roses. Your parents are still alive, then show that love, honor them. Those are four ways that you can be the child of a happy mother and the happy child of a happy mother. So be good to yourself and honor your father and your mother that it may be well with thee.
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