The Reality Choice – Part 2

SPEAKER 02 : 0:02

Hey everyone, it’s so great to have you with us today on Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope. We are going to continue our very encouraging series today called Life’s Healing Choices. And in these lessons, Rick Warren will guide us through a deep biblical exploration of how to overcome the hurts, hang-ups, and habits that really hold us back. So get ready for some practical insights and powerful truths that can lead to lasting change and freedom in your life. I’m so excited to hear what Rick shares today in the final part of a message called The Reality Choice.

SPEAKER 01 : 0:40

You know, I was cleaning out the refrigerator this week. That can be quite a spiritual experience. And I learned a very important theological truth in cleaning out the refrigerator. Stuff doesn’t have to stink for it to be rotten. That’s profound. Now some vegetables, when they go rotten, they let you know it. You ever smelled a rotten potato? Oh baby, oh baby. That stinks. A potato, when it’s rotten on the inside, it lets you know it. But you know what, an avocado can rot and it still looks okay on the outside and it doesn’t smell. But they’re both just as rotten. Now here’s the point. Some of you think I don’t need recovery because my rottenness doesn’t stink. We think just the smelly people need CR. Just because you’re rotten doesn’t stink doesn’t mean you’re not rotten. There’s stuff in you you don’t like. I’m not talking about what God doesn’t like. I’m talking about stuff in your life you don’t even like about you. You go, man, I wish I could change that. I always do that and I just wish I didn’t do that. I wish I could be more loving, more unselfish. I wish I didn’t lose my temper so much. I wish I didn’t have that compulsion. I wish I didn’t have that fear. I wish I weren’t so insecure. The point is nobody’s more broken than you and you’re not more broken than anybody else, but we’re all in the same boat. We’re all in the same boat. You’re as broken as everybody else and depravity is total. Now because of our pride and because of our fear, we don’t wanna be honest about this. We don’t wanna admit our weaknesses. We don’t wanna admit our fears. We don’t wanna admit, have you ever seen somebody who says, man, you’re getting angry. I am not angry. Yes, you are. I am not angry. It’s really obvious they’re angry. But we don’t wanna admit our emotions a lot of the time. But because of our pride and fear, we try to fix ourselves. And Jeremiah says it this way, up here on the screen, Jeremiah 2.13. My people have committed two sins. One, they have forsaken me, the spring of living water. I’m the one who’s got all the answers, God says, for your life. And two, they’ve dug their own broken wells, their own broken cisterns that can’t hold water. Not only do we reject God, we make up our own plan to fix ourselves. And it doesn’t hold water. Isn’t it amazing all the things that people will try to get their life together instead of God? They’ll try astrology, aromatherapy, crystals, reading your palm, acupuncture, and on and on. And they’ll go to fads and therapies and conferences and cults and tapes and motivational seminars and read books and believe the wackiest, stupidest ideas. Try everything except God. We build our own wells, and the wells are cracked and won’t hold water. Friends, You can go on every good diet you can go on and every other thing you can do, but you can’t solve a spiritual problem with a physical substance. Let me say it again. You can’t solve spiritual brokenness with a physical substance, whether it’s a pill or a drug or alcohol or television or pornography or anything else. It didn’t want to relieve your pain ultimately. You cannot solve your spiritual problem with a physical substance. So the first thing I have to do if I’m going to be poor in spirit is I must humbly admit I don’t have it all together. Humbly admit I need help. Here’s the second thing I need to do. I need to humbly ask God for help. I admit, then I ask. I admit I need help, then I ask God for help. I move from confession, I admit I need help, to petition, I need help. I’m asking God for help. And in 2 Corinthians 1.9, Paul says it like this. He was going through a tough time. He said, we despaired of even life itself. Did you know that one point Paul said, I was ready to kick the bucket. I was so depressed, I was so discouraged, I was ready to give up on life. And then he says here in this verse, we saw how powerless we were to help ourselves. That’s step one, poor in spirit. I don’t have the power to change. But that was good. Why would it be good to admit my helplessness and powerlessness? For then we put everything into the hands of God. You don’t know God’s all you need till God’s all you got. For then we put everything into the hands of God who alone could save us for he can even raise the dead. If God can raise a dead person, he can raise a dead marriage. If God can raise a dead person, he can raise a dead career. If God can raise a dead person, he can raise a dead dream. If God can raise a dead person, he can restore the love and romance in your marriage. God can do miracles. Anybody can bring good out of good. God brings good out of bad. He specializes in turning crucifixions into resurrections. So I ask God for help. Now notice on that verse, notice there on the outline, it says we couldn’t help ourselves, we put everything into the hands of God. Circle the word everything. This is total surrender. Kay wrote a book on this called Dangerous Surrender. It’s not partial surrender. Well, okay, like my finances are in a mess, so I’m gonna give God my finances. No, you gotta give him all of your life. Or my sex life in a mess, so I’m gonna give him my sex life. No, you gotta give him all of your life. It’s total surrender. We put everything in his hands. Let me ask you a question. Have you done this? Have you ever come to the point in your life where you say, okay, God, everything in my life, good, the bad, the ugly, the stinking, the rotten, the happy, the sad, the up, the down, I put it all in your hands. I put it all in your hands. I beg you as a friend and pastor who loves you, don’t wait until you hit bottom. Sometimes we’re so obstinate, God has to lay us flat on our back to make us look up to him. You see, there’s an easy way and there’s a hard way to do this. The easy way to change is to see the light. The hard way is to feel the heat. The problem is most of us rarely change until our fear of change is exceeded by the pain. And then when the pain gets so great, we go, okay, I gotta get help. Don’t get to that place where everything has to drop out in your life and five things have to go wrong at once. for you to admit, I need help and I ask God for help. I come to God and I ask him. I love the message paraphrase of this first beatitude. There on your outline, Matthew 5.3, you’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. Congratulations. With less of you, there’s more of God and his rule. I admit I need help. I ask God for help. And then there’s a third thing. If I really wanna be poor in spirit, and this is the hardest of all for many people, I must humbly accept help from other people. I must humbly accept help from others. And this is the third way God has wired us in such a way that we don’t get well by ourselves. Let me be very blunt with you. You know that problem you’d like to get rid of in your life, that temptation, that defect, that fault, that fear, that worry, that loneliness, that whatever is in your life that messes you up, you’re never gonna get rid of it on your own. If you could, you would, but you can’t, so you won’t. You’re only gonna get well when you’re honest with others, not just God. but with others. You say, well, I don’t want to do that. Why do I do that? It humbles you, and God gives grace to the humble. It is your pride that keeps you stuck. It’s your pride that keeps you stuck. Now, the Bible says this in Ecclesiastes 4, 9. Two are better than one. talking about people, because they have a good return for their work. And if one falls down, his friend can help him up. That’s called recovery. But pity the man who falls and has no one there to help him up. You see, God wired us, as I said, that we need each other. And 58 times in the New Testament, it uses the phrase one another. Love one another and care for one another and help one another, encourage one another, pray for one another, support one another, counsel one another. We are to help each other out. That’s why we have church. We are to help each other out. You were never meant to go through life as a lone ranger. You were never meant to go through it on your own. You were never meant to face your problems or your sins by yourself, right? We need each other and we have a longing for belonging and we’re not just believers, we’re belongers and we’re to help each other out. And the fact is we need each other to be healthy. If you don’t have anybody in your life that you can be totally brutally honest with, I pity you because you’re not healthy. Because God wired us in such a way that we only get well in community. That’s why we have small groups. We only grow in community. That’s why we have small groups. And when you’re going through a tough time, you need other people around you. Did you know that the Bible says that when a guy’s going through a tough time and he’s so upset he can’t even believe in God, he still deserves to have friends. God says, even when people don’t believe in me, they still deserve to have friends who hang in there with them. Look at this verse on the screen, Job 6, 14. A despairing man, means somebody who’s given up on his career, his marriage, his life, whatever. A despairing person should have the devotion of his friends, even though he forsakes the fear of the Almighty. He’s saying, God says this, that I put people on earth to help each other out. And even when a guy’s going through a tragedy, he goes, I don’t even believe in God right now. I’m so mad. I’m so angry. I’m so ticked off. I’m so upset. I’m in such a crisis. I feel so lost. I don’t even believe in God. He still deserves friends who will be around him and say, well, we believe in you. And don’t worry about it. We’ll believe in God for you. We’re gonna carry you through on our faith. We will believe God for you and we’re gonna pull you through this crisis. God says, that’s real friendship. And he says, pity the person who hasn’t ever gotten in a group and gotten close to somebody close enough to do that, to help each other out. Now this is why we have 4,000 plus small groups, Bible study groups in this church. Because it’s not enough to just come and sit and soak and sour. You need to get in a group where people can know you and help you on a personal basis when the tough times come and when you can help other people when their tough times come. You see, if all you do is come to church on Sunday, you get the word once a week. That would be like eating a banquet once a week and fasting for the next six days. What would that do to your digestive system? You wouldn’t be very healthy if all you did is get the word once a week and the rest of the week you fasted. You need the word one-on-one during the week. And when you go to a small group Bible study, you get a little second boost of the word of God. And that gives you strength. I got a friend named Walter who’s a pastor in Houston and he said this week that his son had an iPhone and the battery went dead on it. And so he plugged it into his MacBook, the Apple laptop, they’re called MacBooks. And he said he plugged his iPhone into his MacBook to recharge it, but it wasn’t recharging. And he couldn’t figure out why he wasn’t getting any more power. And he said, finally, I opened it up. And he said, I realized that I only get the power when the book is opened. Hmm. I only get the power when the book is opened. And when you sit in a Bible study with three or four other people in somebody’s house or a Starbucks or in an office and the book is open, guess what? You get the power. That’s where it comes from for living. Now this next verse on your outline is one of the most important verses for your health and holiness and hope and becoming that Christ and getting over your habits and hangups. So I want us to read it together. James 5.16. Admit your faults to God. Oh, sorry. Read it again. Admit your faults to the psychiatrist. Oh, never mind. Let me read it again. Admit your faults to the priest. Oh. No, let’s really read it this time. Admit your faults to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed. Now circle the word healed and circle the word admit and circle the word pray and circle the word each other and draw a line between them because if you wanna be healed in your life, that’s the key. Admit your faults to one another and pray for each other so you may be healed. How many times over 30 years have you heard me say this? Revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing. It’s based on that verse. The way you get well in life is by revealing your feeling. And when I’m on the patio and somebody comes up and says, Pastor Rick, I’ve never told this to anybody. I know they’re on the road to recovery. I know that they’re about to experience freedom for the first time. Because when they share for the first time, I’ve never told this to anybody. And they share it with me. All of a sudden, they’re opening the closet door and the boogeyman comes out and he’s not as big as we thought he was. And there’s this. Why didn’t I do that a long time ago? There is relief and there is healing just in sharing, just in admitting. Why? Because the moment you get, you humble yourself and God gives grace to the humble. To sharing that fear, to sharing that fault, sharing that difficulty, revealing your feeling is the beginning of healing. Now this is the hardest step for some of you because it really hits your pride. In other words, I don’t mind telling God about my habit, but I’m not about to tell anybody else. And I don’t mind telling God about my attraction, but I’m not gonna tell anybody else. And my stomach just starts churning even thinking about it. I don’t mind telling God, because I know he already knows about my addiction, about my problem, about my fear, but I’m not about to tell anybody else. Well, good luck. You’ll be stuck in it the rest of your life because you’re never going to get well on your own. Never. God has wired us in a way that we need each other to grow. Now let me be real clear about this. If all you wanna do is be forgiven, tell God. But if you wanna be healed, you gotta tell other people. Now you don’t have to tell everybody. You don’t have to put it on the Goodyear blimp at the Super Bowl. You only need to tell one or two other people. People that you trust, who don’t have a big mouth, who are gonna love you unconditionally, who aren’t gonna blame you, but are gonna go, yep, me too. I’ve been there, done that. Or even if it’s not the same thing, they go, well, that’s gotta be tough. You don’t have to tell everybody, but you have to tell somebody. And that starts the healing process. Now listen to me very closely. If you’re serious about actually being changed in the next eight weeks, you’re gonna have to get over your fear of being honest with a few other people. Honestly, my biggest hurdle to holiness, personally, is my desire to look good. I wonder if any of you relate to that. You wanna look good to other people. So you don’t want to tell anybody else about what’s going on in your life. But you know the cool thing? I’ve been in a Bible study group, small group for six years. I don’t have to look good with that group. They know me warts and alls. I don’t have to look good. I don’t have to pretend I’ve got it all together. I don’t have to. I can share fears and faults and sins. Everybody needs a place like that. Now, I really want you to have relief and release and freedom, but you’re gonna have to deal with this fear of honesty that you’ve got in your life of like, well, nobody will understand what I’m going through. There are three fears that Satan keeps you stuck with. Three fears. The first fear that Satan keeps you stuck in a rut with is the fear of your own emotions. That’s a fear. And it is the fear that if I deal with this issue, that memory, that event, that sin, that abuse, that accident, that hurt, that evil, wicked, mean, bad and nasty thing, if I actually face it, I will not be able to handle my emotions. I won’t be able to handle the grief. I won’t be able to handle the shame. I won’t be able to handle my own emotions. In fact, I may just go crazy. Now let me deal with something right now. If you’ve ever felt I’m going out of my mind, I’m going crazy, relax. If you’ve ever felt I’m going crazy and if I dealt with that, I would literally go crazy. You need to understand two things. Number one, every human being has had that fear. You’re not so special. Everybody else has felt they were going crazy. Everybody else has felt at different times that they were losing their mind. So it’s not a big deal. Everybody else has felt at different times in their life that they were losing their mind or had the fear that they were losing their mind. And number two, the second thing I say is only rational people have that fear. So you’re not crazy. Everybody take a deep breath. You’re not crazy. Only rational people have that fear. Let me let you in a little secret. Crazy people aren’t afraid of being crazy. So the very fact that you’re afraid I might go crazy means you ain’t doing it. Now I want everybody to smile right now. And in a minute, I want you to look at a person next to him, smile and say, I’m broken, but I’m not crazy. Okay, do that right now. Smile, say, I’m broken, but I’m not crazy. I’m broken, but I’m not crazy. I’m broken, but I’m not crazy. Welcome to crazy community church. No, we’re not crazy, we are broken. That’s okay, we’re all in the same boat. And just knowing we’re all in it together means okay, so I don’t have to kinda quit pretending. Everybody in this room has fears. Everybody in this room has insecurities. Everybody in this room wants to look good. Everybody in this room has habits they don’t like. We’re all in the same boat. You’re broken but you’re not crazy. There’s that fear of your own emotion. Now there’s a second fear you have and it is the fear of the reactions of others. And I’m afraid to be honest because you might reject me. You might dismiss me. You might think I’m less of a Christian. You might think I’m evil. You might abandon me and I’ve been there. I don’t wanna be honest because you might reject me and I don’t like that. Why am I afraid to tell you I am? Because if I tell you who I am, I’m all I’ve got and if you don’t like it, I’m up a creek. And so I’m afraid of your rejection and I’m afraid of your disapproval and I’m afraid that you’ll try to fix me. You need to get over that fear. There’s another fear that people have about being honest and it is the fear that being honest is useless. What will it do? What’s the point of it? Why tell anybody else about what I’m struggling with? Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt, didn’t help. No, you didn’t go there. You haven’t ever really been totally honest. Because if you had, you’d already be released. You’d already be released. And the fact is, God says, confess your faults one to another, whereby you will be healed. That is a promise, and God is not a liar. Friends, this is gonna be a life-changing eight weeks. But Jesus’ Beatitudes have nothing to offer you unless you’ve accepted Jesus. You have faith in him. Last verse on your outline. When we were unable to help ourselves, which is right now, at the moment of our need, which is right now, Christ died for us. It’s the cross, the cross, the cross, the cross. Jesus came to give you grace, and grace is the power to change. You gotta accept Christ into your life. Now you may be thinking, well, my problem isn’t that bad. Question, how bad does it have to get before you ask for help? And one guy said, you know, the acid of my pain finally ate through the wall of my denial. If you feel at the end of your rope, congratulations. Now’s the time for change, let’s bow our heads. What’s unhealthy or out of balance in your life? What needs changing? I wanna invite you right now to join the rest of us as we take these eight steps to getting healthy again. Will you take the first step today? It may be the hardest one. It means being honest and facing up to maybe an issue that you’ve been afraid to face for a long, long, long time. I’m gonna pray for you, and then you can follow me in a prayer. Father, because not one of us is perfect, we all have areas of our lives that are unhealthy and out of balance. And some of these areas, Lord, are so painful that we can hardly even stand to think about them. I know, Lord, there are people here today who have struggled with shame and guilt and secrets and depression and low self-esteem. And I know, Lord, there are others here that are in a marriage that’s stuck or it’s cold, it’s grown cold, it’s dying. Maybe they’re even separated right now. There are many people here struggling with a habit, a secret sin, a hurt. the fear of being out of control, the fear that they’re losing their mind and going crazy. Lord, give them the courage to take the first step to health right now. Now you pray. In your mind say, dear God, I wanna take the first step to getting healthy again today. I realize that I am not God, but I’ve often acted like I was. I’ve tried to control things and I’m sorry. I’ve done things that you told me not to do and I’ve not done things you told me to do. But I’m not gonna run anymore. And today, I want to be poor in spirit. First, I humbly admit that I need your help. I don’t wanna hide my hurts or sins anymore. And I know that I’m helpless to control my tendency to do the wrong things that are unhealthy for me. I ask you to take the pieces of my unmanageable life and begin the process. I’m asking for help. And even more than that, Lord, I’m asking that you give me the courage to accept help from others. I don’t wanna just be forgiven. I wanna be healed. I wanna get this behind me so the rest of my life can be the best of my life. I know that Satan’s going to throw all kinds of fears at me the next eight weeks, but help me to stick with this and change me. I pray this in Jesus’ name.

SPEAKER 02 : 27:46

Hey, if you’ve just prayed along with Rick to accept Jesus in your life, Rick would love to hear from you. Just email rick at pastorrick.com. Here’s Rick with a very encouraging letter.

SPEAKER 01 : 27:58

You know, I love getting these letters from you. And let me just read one for you today. It’s from a woman named Lauren. She says, Pastor Rick, every day when I’m doing my routine tasks or I’m commuting to work, I’m listening to the Daily Hope podcast online. I listen and I re-listen and I re-listen again to all the messages, knowing the value that they’ve had on my life. Rick, these messages have transformed my heart from a bitter, hardened, distrustful place toward not only people but God to being in a place where I now have joy daily. I’ve got a joy that is not possible without God. And not only has my life been transformed, I’ve seen my family’s life transformed. Rick, it is through all that God has done and continues to do in this broadcast and through your life and ministry that my family has been transformed. I am excited to say that I’m now a donor to your podcast, starting with this paycheck. I’ve been so blessed by all you’ve given to us as listeners that I’m now blessed to give back. God bless you, Lauren. Well, Lauren, by the way, Lauren, if you were my daughter, you’d be Lauren Warren. Thanks for the encouragement. I’m so glad to hear how God is working in your family. And by the way, thank you for your contribution. It allows us to take this good news to other Laurens around the world and other people around the world. Your prayers and support matter. Thank you for listening. And by the way, everybody, God bless you. And join me next time as we continue to look into God’s word for our daily hope.

SPEAKER 02 : 29:33

Hey, if you’d like to support Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope, just go to pastorrick.com. Again, that’s pastorrick.com. And really, from the bottom of our hearts, we thank you so much for your support. Your gift to Daily Hope helps us share the hope of Christ with people everywhere. This program is sponsored by Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope and your generous financial support.