The Transformation Choice – Part 3

SPEAKER 01 : 0:02

Hey everyone, it’s so great to have you with us today on Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope. We are going to continue our very encouraging series today called Life’s Healing Choices. And in these lessons, Rick Warren will guide us through a deep biblical exploration of how to overcome the hurts, hang-ups, and habits that really hold us back. So get ready for some practical insights and powerful truths that can lead to lasting change and freedom in your life. Okay, now here’s Rick with the final part of a message called The Transformation Choice.

SPEAKER 02 : 0:40

Now you finish this sentence for me ten times in your mind. It’s just like me to be, and I’ll tell you, your old identity. God says, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s what you’ve been all your life. But if you’ll go through these steps of recovery, these steps of growth, these steps of healing, I’m going to give you a new identity. You’re not going to be Jacob anymore. You’re going to be a prince. You’re going to be a princess. So Jacob gets a new identity in conversion. Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he’s a new creature. The old has passed away. The new has come. And the second thing is it says, and he blessed him. You get blessed. And that leads us to this week’s beatitude. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness. When you’re hungry and thirsty, you say, I’ve got to have it at all costs. Hunger and thirst for righteousness. Let me say it another way. I’m not letting go of you until you bless me, God. That’s what it means to hunger and thirst for righteousness. It’s exactly what Jacob did. I’m not letting go. I’m not settling for second best. I want your blessing on my life. This is the transformation step. There on your outline. Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life. He’s going to change my identity. He’s going to bless me. And humbly ask him to remove my character defects. Thank God I’m not what I used to be. But thank God I’m not what I’m going to be. God isn’t finished with Rick Warren yet. Hang around. I’m getting better. And you are too. You are too. Hang around. I’m not what I used to be. I’m just not. But I’m not what I’m going to be either. That is the transformation process. Now, before I give you this final key that is so important, you’ve got to have this. I want you to hear the story of a modern-day Jacob. Well, hi there.

SPEAKER 03 : 3:02

Growing up… My leg, it grew at a different rate. I had a bone disease, and by the time I was nine, my leg was two and a half inches difference in length and very weak. And considering the options, the doctors ended up amputating my lower leg so that I could then use a prosthetic leg. I had only had a few friends because I really couldn’t keep up physically in sports with them. And so instead, I would spend a lot of my time in front of the TV and in front of the Internet. I was drawn in by a world where no one knew of my physical hang-ups and my social awkwardness. I could be whomever my lies said I was. I did not have to deal with missing a leg or puberty or shyness. Now, on the Internet, I escaped, first through pornography and then through chatting with other women. It gave me a false sense of power, control, and self-worth. I became addicted to all the habits that went into this. I had trusted my life to Jesus as a boy, but didn’t really know the realness and personal side of Jesus Christ. Near the end of my senior year of high school, I had a spiritual awakening at a wilderness youth retreat. The guy talked about Jesus, and from there I took him in, and my life was changed. And the guilt for my sin was lessened, and my depression and loneliness had lightened. And I met some friends and started attending a weekly Bible study. And all this was great and helpful, but my addiction to lust and pornography continued. And the shame and the guilt just became more. Now, I attended a Christian university where I was surrounded by a lot of spiritual food. On the outside, I smiled and was active and spiritual, attending a men’s Bible study and also a men’s accountability group. But I never had the courage to speak up and share my struggle with internet pornography. I was so afraid of the shame and the fear of rejection. I would be alone and unloved forever. At least that’s what I kept telling myself. Over and over I made commitments to myself to stop by sheer willpower. I tell myself over and over again, this will be the last time. I don’t need this. I don’t want this. I will stop it. But of course it continued. I wasn’t going to be healed on my own. I knew the Bible says nothing is impossible for God, so I prayed, and I prayed for God to take away what I could not stop doing. I wanted God to give me that simple pill, that short prayer to say I could instantly be cured of my addiction to pornography. Every once in a while, I’d have the thought, I should tell someone. That wasn’t going to happen. And so I made promises to God. I thought that if I was just a stronger Christian, then I could beat this habit. I went to more and more Bible studies, foolishly thinking I could earn a miracle in God’s favor. And then as none of my prayers for instant perfection worked, I started getting resentful towards God. I felt frustrated with the battle going on inside me, and I blamed God for not doing what I wanted Him to do. My addiction continued and my relationships with women degraded. I started focusing on finding women I felt I could manipulate or control. I played the role of a nice Christian guy, but my motives were less than pure. I looked for women that I could try to help or fix. See, if I could help them in some way, then they would need me, and I would feel more self-worth. And eventually, I would push the relationship to get physical, and the relationship would either end or it would get worse at that time. Now, I rationalized all this in my head, how much I could get away disobeying God without actually considering it losing my virginity. I just lied to myself. I was a fool. Inside, I was empty, hurting and alone. With every image I looked at, every woman I tried to manipulate, and every lie I told myself, the pain grew more and more. My depression was growing again, and I became more sarcastic and cynical in public. About then, I got a staph infection in my hip, and it required six months of IV antibiotics. It gave me a lot of time to think, and I started attending a big church nearby called Saddleback Church. It was great for me because I could choose to get lost in the crowd. I’d never have to be too close or too deep in any conversations. But in the college age group, I met a woman named Kelly, and we started dating. After dating six months, I learned I needed a full hip replacement. Now, prior to my surgery, Kelly was nice and she came over to my apartment and helped clean me up. Well, in the process of cleaning, she found a pornographic photo. I lied. I made up a story. It’s someone else’s. And Kelly, she gave me a choice to make. Either I got help or she was leaving me. And it was the most loving thing she could do. I said, okay, I will get help. And we attended Celebrate Recovery that Friday night for the first time. four years ago. And going to the Friday night small groups did what all my prayers and good intentions failed to do. I found others struggling with the same struggles I had. And like Jacob, I was able to admit what I was doing and what I was. I had become a sex addict. I started sharing my hurts, my weaknesses, and my past mistakes. As I took the steps, the ones we’ve been studying together in church the past five weeks during this series, I had my ups and downs, success and failures. But my small group loved me and helped me stay persistent. I fought all my rationalizations that I hadn’t been having affairs because I hadn’t been physical with other women. And I didn’t want to admit that I had been having emotional and mental affairs with these pictures of women, the chat rooms, and two women I was talking with. And with the help of my small group, I was able to take practical steps. The communication with the two women, that ended. I changed my phone, my phone number, and I stopped using my old emails. It took the next couple months after lying and getting caught in more lies that I stopped using online messaging programs, added an internet filter to my work computer, blocked certain channels on my television, and began keeping track of the phone calls I made and the websites I visited. Like Jacob, I have wrestled with God. And like Jacob, I have said, I’m not going to let go unless you bless me. And God did that through my small group once I got honest. If you are struggling with lust, you must learn just that I have. What I’ve been addicted to is a lie. I know that my eyes and my heart were made for one woman, Kelly, who’s now my wife. And in July 2005, five days after receiving one year of sobriety, I got my sobriety chip from my sponsor, and I was able to give that chip to Kelly on our wedding day. And as I close, I want to admit that I’m not cured from temptation. We will always have temptation on this planet. Every day is an opportunity to stumble. But with God and Celebrate Recovery, I can have victory over my addictions. The short-term, cheap pleasure my addiction would give me was just that, short, cheap. My happiness cannot depend on other people or a short-term fix. I found that the only long-term commitment is found in God. I can only be the man I want to be and the man my wife deserves me to be by daily surrendering my life to God and allowing him to use my life for his ways. My growing relationship with Jesus Christ gave me the foundation of love in my life. that no matter what happens, I am loved. Though my sins have been many, I am forgiven. I no longer have to settle for the identity of a hopeless sex addict, but find my identity as a child of the Most High and Mighty God. My identity has been changed permanently. As a result of working the program at CR and maintaining sobriety through my higher power, Jesus Christ, one of the benefits that occurred for me was a clarity of vision. I’ve begun to see that I needed to please other people, even if it meant I was suffering. And now I’ve begun to create new boundaries in those relationships, and I continue to work on standing up for myself. Recovery has helped me start to understand the emotions I’ve medicated for so long. And because of that, I can now better communicate with my wife, my feelings and my needs. Our relationship has been strengthened through the support of those around us at CR. And God has helped me step out of my isolating habits and develop new relationships with other men that offer me support. Thank you.

SPEAKER 02 : 11:50

Now this is really important. How do you know when you’ve made it to phase five? In the conversion step, when God gives you a new name, he gives you a reminder that that you will carry the rest of your life to remind you to trust in him. Now you remember that when God and Jacob are wrestling, the Bible says God dislocated Jacob’s hip. He pulled it out of socket. And the Bible says this, last verse on your outline. The sun rose as Jacob left Peniel. And he was limping because of his hip. I want you to circle the word limping. What is the significance of his limp? After you’ve had a genuine encounter with God, you’re going to have a limp. Now, what is the significance of this limp? Follow me on this real close. Three things. Number one, for his entire life, Jacob had run from conflict. He’d run from his brother. He’d run from his dad. He’d run from his wife. He had run from his father-in-law. He had run from God. God said, we’ll just fix that. No more running. I’m just going to touch your hip so you will limp the rest of your life. You’re not running anymore. You’re not going to run anymore. You’ll never solve a problem by running from it. So he touches his hip. He gives him a limp. Second thing, it was a daily reminder to trust God. Now he touched him right here on his thigh. You know what your thigh muscle is? It is the strongest muscle in your body. It’s the biggest muscle. It’s the strongest muscle in your body. And God touched Jacob at the point of his greatest strength. And he said, you’re no longer going to rely on self-strength anymore. You’re going to rely on me. You’re no longer going to rely on your cuteness, your cleverness, your lies, your manipulation, your background, your ability to talk yourself out of a situation. I’m going to touch you at the point of greatest strength, the most powerful muscle in your body, and you’re going to be remembered that you’ve got to depend on me for strength. He could no longer stand on his own power. And the third meaning of it, when he walked with a limp, is that Jacob emerged both stronger and weaker. He was weaker because he couldn’t walk on his own power anymore. And he was stronger because God says, you’re going to walk in my power. You’ll never walk the same again. You’ve got a new identity. Now listen to me. God’s giants… The men and women that God has always used greatest in life have always walked with a limp. There may be an emotional limp, a physical limp, a mental limp, a relational limp, but there’s going to be something in your life that keeps you reminding God, it’s about me, it’s not about you. God’s great giants, the men and women that he uses, the men and women he blesses, gives new identity to, always walk with a limp. Paul said it like this on the screen, last verse. To keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in the flesh. A limp to torment me. And three times I pleaded with God to take it away from me. But he said, my grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore, I boast about my weaknesses so that Christ’s power may rest on me. The reason why you can’t boast about your weakness in small group is because you’re not at stage five yet. You’re still trying to hide your weaknesses. But to get to five, the change, the blessing, the new identity, you got to admit it. Let’s bow our heads. As we close, I’m going to ask you a couple questions, and I want you to think about this in your mind. Are you experiencing any conflict right now? Congratulations, God’s trying to get your attention. Number two, in what area are you struggling with God? You know the right thing to do, but you just keep ignoring it. You keep fighting with God over it. You’re afraid to trust him. Friend, there is no way you’re going to win. You need to give in to God’s control. Go to the mat. Three, where have you felt like giving up? I’m telling you as your pastor and as your friend who loves you, hold on. Say to God, I am not letting go until you bless me. Number four, when are you going to face the truth about you? When are you going to stop blaming other people for the problems you’ve caused? When are you going to stop pretending that you’re not a problem, that it’s not an addiction, that you don’t have a problem, that it’s just a white elephant, or I mean a pink elephant in the middle of the room and nobody’s going to admit it? When are you going to share your struggle with a friend? Number five, will you let Christ give you a new identity? You see, underneath every Jacob, God sees a prince. He sees in you a princess, a prince. He sees what God meant for you to be. Yeah, you’ve been Jacob, but you’re now going to be Israel, prince of God. Follow me in this prayer in your mind. Dear God, I admit I’m like Jacob, Lord. I’ve been struggling with you and I’ve been fighting with other people. And I got conflicts and stress in my life. And I don’t want to get stuck at stage one in conflict with others. And I certainly don’t want to get stuck at stage two, a struggle with you, a crisis. So today I’m taking these next steps. Three, commitment. I commit myself to you, Jesus Christ, 100%. I open my life, the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s all, I give it to you. Jesus Christ, come in and take over my life. Every area. And number four, I admit that I’m the problem. And not only am I willing to admit it to you and to myself, I’m going to admit it to somebody else. thing that I’ve held on to I’m going to share it with somebody that they can pray with me and become my accountability partner I want you to change my identity if I have to walk with a limp the rest of my life so be it I will glory in my weakness because it shows your greatness I pray this in your name

SPEAKER 01 : 19:59

Hey, let’s talk about something that we all deal with. Hurts, hang-ups, and habits. And whether it’s caused by others, ourselves, or circumstances, these challenges affect every single one of us. And the real question is, how do we move forward? And that’s where the Life’s Healing Choices video-based Bible study from Pastor Rick Warren comes in. This is a powerful study. It offers a path to freedom from those hurts, hang-ups, and habits through eight healing choices that can lead to true happiness and life transformation. It’s rooted in the Beatitudes of Jesus. And Rick guides you through eight engaging video sessions filled with practical and encouraging Bible teaching. You’re also going to hear real-life stories from people whose lives have been transformed by following these eight choices. Now, this video and workbook Bible study shows you how to make each choice, guiding you on God’s pathway to wholeness, spiritual growth, happiness, and healing. Now today, when you give a gift to support Daily Hope’s mission of sharing the good news of Jesus worldwide, you can simply request this life-changing Bible study. It comes with a workbook and access to the teaching videos. It’s available through streaming or DVD. And it’s our way of saying thank you so much for partnering with us in this ministry. We’ll send you a copy today. Just go to pastorrick.com or text the word HOPE to 800-600-5004. That’s pastorrick.com or text the word HOPE to 800-600-5004. Be sure to join us next time as we look into God’s Word for our daily hope. This program is sponsored by Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope and your generous financial support.