Join host Priscilla Ron as she sits down with Adam Coleman, author and founder of Wrong Speak Publishing, to delve into the transformative power of fatherhood and individual identity. As they navigate the challenges of raising children in an ever-evolving world, Adam candidly shares his experiences on balancing parental roles, learning from past mistakes, and his commitment to defying societal pressures. Adam also opens up about his journey as a Black conservative and the profound insights in his books, ‘The Children We Left Behind’ and ‘Black Victim to Black Victor.’ Through thoughtful conversation, Priscilla and Adam discuss the nuances
Welcome to Restoring Education in America with Priscilla Ron. She’s a master educator and author, leading the conversation to restore the American mind through wisdom, virtue, and truth.
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, hello, hello, everybody. Welcome to Restoring Education in America. I’m your host, Priscilla Ron, and I’m so glad you decided to join the conversation today. I have a very special guest. I’m going to welcome to the stage right now, welcoming my friend, Mr. Adam Coleman. How are you, Adam?
SPEAKER 02 :
I’m doing well. Thank you for having me.
SPEAKER 03 :
I’m so glad you decided to join. Now, you and I are meeting and talking actually for the first time in person. We are friends on X, formerly known as Twitter. And you sent me a copy of your book. And I was so impressed by that. But before I go any further, I want to share your bio with the listeners. Mr. Adam Coleman is the author of The Children We Left Behind. and Black Victim to Black Victor. He’s a contributor for the New York Post, public speaker, and founder of Wrong Speak Publishing. He has also appeared on Fox News, Fox Business, Talk TV in the UK, Sky News Australia, and numerous podcasts. But his most important job is a husband and a father. So welcome again, Adam.
SPEAKER 02 :
Thank you.
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, what sparked me to call you was I saw that recently you were on a panel of fathers with Moms for Liberty. And I thought, what is Adam doing at Moms for Liberty? Tell me why you were there.
SPEAKER 02 :
Well, actually, I’ve been to every single Moms for Liberty summit. So from the very beginning, four years ago, they found me on X, inviting me out. And I was always in support. So I tried to help any way they wanted. So I did like writing courses and stuff like that and helped other moms to get more into writing. and things of that nature. But this was the first time they were doing a father’s panel, which I think was a great idea. And so many people came up to me and said, this is my favorite panel throughout the entire event. So what I was doing there was basically doing what I’ve been talking about for a number of years, giving a real honest perspective of being a father, but also being a kid. And my childhood experience helped to shape how I see being a father, how important it is to me and not repeating the wrongs that my father did and being active with my son and kind of filling in the gaps from when I was a kid where I had desires and wants and making sure that I try to do that best I can for my son, especially, you know, being available for him. That’s why on stage I’m talking about it’s not enough for a guy to say, well, I’m a man, I’m a father. So I go out there and make the money. It’s like, well, that’s not just it. Like you don’t get to go to work, come home, fall asleep and then repeat it the next day. Right. Your kids need you. you need to be available for them and understand you got a full-time job long hours all that but there’s a saturday there’s a sunday there’s a time checking out checking on your kids tell them that you’re available even though i’m at work you can call me even though i’m at work you can text me like i care about what’s going on i don’t want you to be afraid i don’t want you worried like dad’s tired i don’t want to burden him Like you have to tell your kids this because otherwise they’re going to people please and then keep it to themselves and they’re going to suffer in silence. So, you know, yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah. I mean, we we’ve talked about the fact that you’re a dad of a 20 year old now, but you were very transparent and vulnerable and talking about your story about your son. Can you share with the listeners briefly your journey as a dad and the situation with mom and where you are today with your son?
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah. You know, I repeated, just like many kids, you repeat what you grew up with. And things that aren’t emphasized, they don’t necessarily become important for you. So I am a son out of wedlock. But it was never emphasized that there is an order to things when I was growing up. I was born out of wedlock as well. And so… It wasn’t until I got a little bit wiser, and especially as my son got older, that I specifically told him there’s a proper order to do this, and here’s why. But as far as my relationship with his mother, we’ve co-parented. She’s never stopped me from seeing him. I’ve never said a bad word about his mother to him. And honestly, I don’t have a bad word to say about his mother anyways. I think she’s a great mother. She did a great job with him. Neither of us are perfect parents. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent. But we care. Both of us really care. And we want the best for our son. Just like any good parent, you try to do the best for your kids. So, I mean, that’s generally my circumstance. But I’m now married. I don’t have any children with my wife. But when she sees my son, it’s like that’s her son as well.
SPEAKER 03 :
That is a beautiful story of your journey to where you are today. And you’re right, we’re not perfect people. And I think a lot of adults who’ve been in a similar circumstance can attest to the fact of how important it is to just learn from our decisions in the past. And you brought up a really great point of We need to be explicit with young people. Just like Charlie Kirk said, you know, get married, have lots of babies, you know, love God and all of these things. And he was really explicit about his advice to young people, because if you don’t hear that, you know, you’re going to repeat the things that you observe your parents doing. I want to go into a little bit of both of your books, Adam Coleman. So the first book, Black Victim to Black Victor. You’ve got a lot of great nuggets in here. I couldn’t decide which one I wanted to read. Story time with Priscilla, okay? But in chapter 10, you titled this chapter, The Miseducation and Misunderstanding of Black Conservatives. And you and I are Black conservatives, and we’ve been called all kinds of names, but On page 137, I have two parts I want to read. On page 137, you say, the difference between individualism and collectivism when discussing race is simple. Collectivism says that I’m a Black man. Individualism says that I am a man that happens to be Black. The difference is significant when discussing the topic of race because of how you view people and how you treat them. I thought, wow, what an impactful thing to say. Talk a little bit more about, I just happen to be black, but I’m just, I’m a man too.
SPEAKER 02 :
Right. You know, the, what I ended up finding is, and listen, human beings are group oriented. If I go to United Kingdom, I come across an American. I feel an affinity to another American, right? We’re group oriented. That’s, that’s a normal, natural thing. The problem is when, your group orientation supersedes even yourself, right? And your default is to advocate only for the benefit of the group and ignoring that there are individuals that are within this group, including yourself. And I’ve seen where people completely disregard something that benefits them to appease what they believe the group wants. And so when we’re talking about race relations in America, I feel as if group orientation is used as a manipulation tactic. It’s used in a way to say, if you’re a real black man or a real black woman, you would do these things. And if you don’t want those things, then you aren’t authentically black. And so it is always to call into question your group identity. But who made you the arbiter of my identity? gets how did you get to determine what being black is and what being black isn’t it’s always the loudest and the most condescending voices who get to say these things with with such arrogance but what’s what’s detrimental is that many people believe them or if they don’t believe them they call into question themselves It reminds me of my wife was on this Facebook group one time with black women. This woman, I can’t remember what the activity was, but she said, do black people do this? And what she was asking was, is it okay? I’m asking the group, is it okay if I like this thing? And it’s so bizarre to me because she clearly is interested in that thing and wants to do that thing. But she needs a group validation, even for interests of hers, just an activity that she would like to do.
SPEAKER 03 :
You’re talking about swimming or horseback riding or jumping off of ledges with a parachute. What are you talking about?
SPEAKER 02 :
It was something I wish I could remember the activity, but it was something that, you know, people do. Sometimes black people do, sometimes black people don’t. Even if you’ve never heard of a black person doing it, why do you need a… strangers who happen to look similar to you? Why do you need a stranger’s approval to do a thing that you’re genuinely interested in? And that is how group orientation has strangled Black people in this country. And some other groups have this issue as well. But this idea that there’s like some invisible rule book on how to be Black, but no one has access to it, but yet everyone swears that they’ve read it.
SPEAKER 03 :
That’s hilarious. If you’re just now tuning in, my guest today is Adam Coleman. He’s the author of The Children We Left Behind and Black Victim to Black Victor. I was looking at the table of contents of your book, The Children We Left Behind, extremely powerful book. This came about a few years after you wrote your Black Victim to Black Victor. And I’m really drawn to this subject matter about children and mothers and fathers and what happens. And you do talk about the situation where there are divorced parents and you might have a single mom with children. And then someone new comes into the picture that develops a relationship with children. particularly the mother. Talk a little bit about what you have learned about some of these scenarios and some of these stories.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, to be very blunt, there are monsters, pedophiles that hunt single mothers to gain access to their children. It’s as plain and simple as that. We don’t see it that way. We occasionally hear of a story where a child just happens to be molested And we just think that just this is just some one off, like just one day, this guy just decided to touch the kids. And we don’t see that this is an entire motive that started from the very beginning. They went on the first date with this woman. Their entire objective was to do that very thing. And that is something that I don’t think we say bluntly enough to women who are in that predicament. First off, there’s nothing wrong with a woman who is single as children for wanting to find love and wanting to have a relationship. It’s perfectly normal and natural. I think the part that is detrimental is we don’t talk about… the severity of risk when approaching that situation. Some people talk about, well, you take things a little bit slow, don’t expose the kids too quickly to the guy. And that’s generally good advice, but they need to understand that Predators will wait. There are men who will get underneath camouflage and sit there waiting for deers for hours in silence just so that deer can cross by so they can shoot them one time. These men will wait six months. They’ll wait a year. They’ll wait until there’s that moment. But there are clues as to who they really are in the very beginning. So we have to be aware of these particular clues. The biggest thing is love bombings. you meet a guy, you’re trying to date and you find these guys who are just terrible and blah, blah, blah. And then you come across this guy who just appears perfect, a bit too perfect. He says, here, here’s a hundred dollars. Give it to your kids. Tell them to buy anything that they want. Almost immediately, your kids are my kids. How can I help you? Like he is incredibly forward about wanting to be in your life, which sounds good. But it’s too good. It’s too good to be true. And so you have to be very wary about that. It doesn’t feel natural. He showers you with gifts. He showers you with compliments almost immediately, like just very quickly, because he’s in hunting mode. And it works on certain women because they’re tired. Like raising a bunch of kids on your own is tiresome. Doing it by yourself is tiresome. Having someone say, give me that load and I will shoulder it for you, even if it’s just for an hour or two. They step in and say, why don’t you go to the spa? I’ll take care of the kids. I’ll watch them. I’ll babysit. Don’t worry about that. Sounds like a gift, but it’s actually a ploy to get closer to your children.
SPEAKER 03 :
So Adam, that sounds pretty scary for a mom who might be listening. What are the signs that a woman would look for in order to protect her children? Because at the end of the day, we definitely want to protect our children. But knowing the difference between someone who generally is loving and caring and would be a good parental figure versus someone who is a predator? How does a woman know the difference?
SPEAKER 02 :
So the biggest one is love bombing. That’s a big tell. They shower you with gifts, shower with compliments. They are everything. They just they’re everything almost immediately. It’s not a gradual thing. It’s not how you would normally date. It’s almost it’s too fast. So they move too fast. They say, let me move in and I’ll help you with the bills like they’re way too fast and they want to jump into a relationship. So that’s a big tell. But the other tell is. are your children comfortable with this person? Because I’ve seen too many times where the mother says, oh, they’re not comfortable with him yet because it’s not their dad and blah, blah, blah. No, as human beings, we have intuition. And some people just have an intuition, like something is off with this person. It could be a glance. It could be a comment that they made. It could be anything. You don’t know. And if your kids are around this person, and they’re not comfortable, and month by month goes by, and they’re not getting more comfortable, they’re resisting. I would highly suggest, even if that person is not a predator, I would highly suggest not moving forward until your children are comfortable with moving forward. If you’re forcing it upon your children, even if that person is not a predator, you’re creating a bigger issue. And the last thing, and it might sound counterintuitive for someone, but the If the father of your children is in your children’s life, right, they have visitation and stuff like that, honestly, if he has a problem with that person, you should probably listen to him. Because a lot of women interpret, oh, he just doesn’t want me to move on from him. No. If he’s saying, listen, I don’t trust this guy around my kids. There’s a reason. Like men see men differently than a woman will see a man. We can see beyond the other stuff. You’re in love. You’re in your emotions. I see this guy and he is sketchy. In many cases where as a guy, I’ve had female friends and I’m like, something’s off with this guy. I don’t have romantic interest in my female friend. I’m telling you something is off with this guy. And then they, sometimes they find out the hard way. So I think it’s very important to listen to whether it’s your, your ex or another non-sexual male in your life, your father, your brothers, your cousins, whoever have another man assess that guy, have them be around him. And, and just like, have them be cordial, have them be like internal spies. And you’re like, Hey man, you know, we just, man, we can hang out. We can talk and just let them talk and see if they say something. And they’re like, Oh, this guy, no, you should not trust this guy and move forward.
SPEAKER 03 :
This is just more of an attestment of how important it is to have really strong, godly fathers and men in our lives. The design was to have godly fathers who would lead and love their wives and their children. And when that order is broken, it does create a lot of chaos. But that’s really good advice is if you’re a single mom and you have a good godly father, a good godly brothers, you know, that’s, those are the people that you should seek godly counsel from for sure. If you’re tuning in, my special guest today is Adam Coleman. He’s an author and he has a publishing company called Wrong Speak, where you encourage honest, nuanced dialogue. Why do you think so many people are afraid to speak their minds these days?
SPEAKER 02 :
Well, I think it’s actually becoming.
SPEAKER 03 :
They’re not afraid to speak their minds.
SPEAKER 02 :
I was going to say, I think they’re becoming more open talking. But there was a window, especially around 2020, where people were being canceled. They were told to be quiet. And even worse, encouraged to self-censor. Be afraid to say that thing. And, you know, I went through it a little bit. But I wanted to write the book. Black Victim of the Black Victor because I felt the need to say something. And I didn’t know if 10 people were going to read it. I didn’t know if a million people were going to read it. I just wanted to do it to express myself and to put it out there. And also to demonstrate for my son that you should be willing to risk things to speak the truth and express yourself if you feel the calling to do so. And I feel the calling to do so. So I would say that If you feel the calling to speak out, do not be afraid of the repercussions. As long as you are doing something that is righteous, you should not be afraid. You will always be attacked. But what I would tell you is that fear is greater than the reality. The fear of being canceled and losing friends and losing family, I had the opposite happen. My family embraced me. I gained a ton more friends. and even my job at the time, embraced what I had done and congratulated me, right? Come to find out that I’m not speaking some irreverent nonsense that no one agrees with. Actually, what I’m saying is what the vast majority of people understand as common sense. I’m not saying something that is reckless. I’m not saying something that is meant to harm people. I’m saying things because I’m actually trying to help, but I’m being critical of the things that are being told to me.
SPEAKER 03 :
You would think that the things that you say are embraced by the masses, but you get pushed back every now and again. Like you said, with the group think, people who say you shouldn’t say this or you shouldn’t advocate for what you’re advocating for because it could be construed as racist or siding with ideology that’s racist. But we have young people now who are being raised in this generation who where they’re seeing how expensive it is to own a home and they’re seeing how expensive it is to get a college degree and the return on investment for a college degree isn’t there anymore. So what do you think is the message to young people today about what they’re seeing. I mean, we’re seeing a lot of socialist ideas and protests happening and flip-flopping about what the government should and shouldn’t be doing. But what’s your advice to young people who are still in school?
SPEAKER 02 :
I guess my broader advice to young people is do not fall for the nihilism propaganda. Are we going to experience issues in the future? Absolutely. Are there things that are going to be good in the future? Absolutely. Are they going to have to compete against AI and robots? Maybe at some point. I mean, that’s just a reality. But it’s about doing things in spite of. The people who will still succeed even in the face of all those challenges are the most resilient people. And you want to be amongst the population who are the most resilient and flexible. You want to go into avenues that are going to be longer lasting. It’s one of those things where my son, he wants to become an electrician. I’m glad he chose to go that route versus going to college and just getting some arbitrary degree just to say that he got a college degree. I always wanted him to choose his own path, but understand here’s the future. You’re going to college not so I can brag to people how you got a college degree. You’re going to college for your future, and I want you to do something, one, that you’re satisfied with doing, and two, that will lead you towards whatever you determine as success. And I want him to be armed with that information, but I don’t want him to feel, woe is me, nothing will work, everything will fall apart, we’re all doomed, and so on and so forth. And I’m seeing… The abundance of nihilism propaganda, whether it’s on YouTube, whether it’s on TikTok, TikTok and all these other platforms rarely show you something good that happens. And if they show you something good, it’s usually manufactured. Like it’s the guy who’s giving a homeless guy money, but he’s filming it. Right. It’s it’s it’s fake. But they’re falling for the bad relationship here. See, men and women can’t get along. The really bad divorce that happened here. See, marriage isn’t worth it. A difficult child here. Children are a burden and they’re an economic burden as well. They’re being demoralized to do things that the Bible instructs us to do plenty of. We’re supposed to procreate. We’re supposed to find love. We’re supposed to connect with people. I’ve become a better man since I got married. Actually, before I got married, meeting my wife, she has made me a better person. I wouldn’t be doing these things without my wife. In the moments where I thought, no, I couldn’t do that. Even with writing the book, I wouldn’t be able to do that without the support of my wife. Because when I had the question and the sort of doubt, she said, yeah, you should do that. And I did it. But if she wasn’t there, would I have done it? I don’t know. All of these different things, men and women work better together. We’re meant to be together. We’re meant to work together. That’s how we flourish as a society. But I’m just seeing so much content that is revolved around that men and women are your enemy and you can’t trust them. And that, you know, women are sociopaths. So here’s how you win men out sociopath the women, you know, use them because they’re just going to use you for your money. Like you just hear all these terrible messages and all it does is leave children broken and it leaves them miserable and lost.
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, clearly your faith, it leads you. I’ve been following you on X and you’ve been really bold about your faith. And it’s really, really critical that we have men be more bold. I’ve noticed even our elected officials are being more bold about their faith. And that’s OK, because I remind people it’s not freedom from religion, it’s freedom from of religion. And I’m looking at the clock, Adam, and we’ve got to land our planes. So take about a minute and tell us about your books one more time, where people can find you and where they can purchase your book.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, the book is available everywhere. They can go on Amazon and purchase a copy. They can go on wrongspeak.net if they want to avoid giving money directly to Jeff Bezos. They can order on wrongspeak.net. I also have an audio book. It’s I’m working on it, but it’s everywhere except for, uh, audible, unfortunately. Um, and, um, yeah, they can follow me on sub stack. I don’t be Coleman dot sub stack.com.
SPEAKER 03 :
Adam Coleman, the author of The Children We Left Behind, Black Victim to Black Victor. It’s a great read, great nuggets, great chapters. He’s a man of faith and he’s a father, bold enough to go into an auditorium of moms and It’s amazing how much you have supported mothers and supported the movement and being a great example of fatherhood and just developing who you are. So hopefully we can continue to have more conversations in the future, Adam. um to my listeners thank you so much for tuning in catch me next time and remember educating the mind without the heart is no education so seek wisdom cultivate virtue and speak truth
SPEAKER 01 :
Thanks for tuning in to Restoring Education in America with Priscilla Ron. Visit PriscillaRon.com to connect or learn how you can sponsor future episodes to keep this message of faith, freedom, and education on the air.
